What do competency, congruency, and connection have to do with your confidence? You might be surprised..but it is just about everything when it comes to building your confidence skill.
Yes, I just referred to your confidence as a skill. That is amazing news because that means that confidence is something that can be trained and developed with practice and consistency. Sure confidence also comes from an outfit that makes you feel like a million dollars or a genuine compliment, but that kind of confidence seems temporary. To build the kind of confidence that lasts no matter what the scale says or how your hair looks you’ve got to dig a little deeper. And I hate to say it, but you’ve got to look within yourself. Maybe that is not such a bad thing after all…If your confidence is not dependent on external circumstances (ie having a good hair day or a banging body) then you can be confident no. matter. what.
Let’s dive into the three Cs mentioned above, starting with competency. Think about a time in your life when you were ‘new’ at something. Because you were just learning, you might have felt like you had to double or triple check everything before you were done. But as you became more competent, your confidence grew too. So if you are new to something like working out or shopping for nutritious foods and cooking, give yourself some grace while you figure it out.
Have you ever felt like you were saying one thing, but then you kept doing something else completely? You couldn’t pinpoint exactly what, but something just felt off..I was recently in a position like this myself. The work I was doing at one point was aligned with my vision, but as I got further into it, I began to realize that my vision and what was required of me through this job did not line up.
Let me tell you, that lack of congruency between what I really wanted and what I was doing to get it made it really hard to continue doing the work. So maybe you’ve mentioned you want to get healthier or maybe you want to spend more time with your kids or your husband, but you find yourself on your phone instead of engaged with your loved ones or that you are still overeating. There is a slight disconnect between what you say you want and what you are prepared to do to get there. It is worth taking some time to explore why you might be hesitant to take the action needed to reach those goals.
So now that you’ve given yourself some time to build your competency and you’ve explored/ resolved areas around congruency with your goals + actions, let’s talk about how important it is to be connected. Not only to your goals, dreams, and aspirations, but also to others on a similar journey as yourself. When you surround yourself with others that are on the same path as you, your confidence to achieve will grow. You can cheer each other on and brain storm strategies.
Your homework for today is to explore which of these three might be missing in your endeavor to be more confident. Remember, we want to move beyond just feeling confident to being confident. I’d love to hear your thoughts and your struggles! Be sure to check out our FB community and if you need some help setting goals you are actually excited to crush, then grab this >> freebie <<
Photo Credit: Silva Caique