Don’t fall into the diet trap this Thanksgiving |Be empowered around food without any guilt or shame

Are you ready for the food olympics? aka Thanksgiving…or the stretch between now and the New Year.

We are headed out of town this week for the holiday and I am so excited. Yes, the food will be amazing and so will the family time. But for the first time, I am not feeling overwhelmed or stressed about ‘sticking to my plan/ program’. I know how silly that probably sounds. But its freedom, y’all!

I know I probably won’t make the time to do my full workouts (nor would I even have the equipment), but I am planning to still get in a walk everyday–trying to get those 10,000 steps 😉

I know I will probably drink a bit more wine that I usually do, so I plan to double fist it with the water in one hand and the wine in the other. You’ve heard the water to wine story, right?!

I know there will be so much good food, cause that’s how we do. So I am planning on eating at normal intervals (when my body tells me I’m hungry), making mindful choices (only eating what I LOVE), and eating it slowly (so I know when to stop).

Stop dieting and start living your life with food freedom

In the past, there was so much anxiety around the holidays for me. I couldn’t wait for them to come, but could always feel myself on edge. Because I had been living life in so much food restriction I couldn’t help myself but to binge on all the holiday foods that seemed ‘off limits’ for the rest of the year.

Giving yourself the permission to eat any and ALL of the foods you want, in the amount you want, whether you’re hungry or not is ok. But so is choosing not to.

Whatever you decide, make sure YOU are the one making the choice and the choices you’re choosing are intentional, mindful, and kind.

Don’t let others push their agenda on you or their own food issues your way. Likewise, notice if you start slipping back into some of the diet-y mindsets.

Be sure to grab your FREE guide before you head into the holiday weekend. It’s packed with all sorts of strategies you can use not only during the holidays, but year round!

Here’s to happy, healthy holidays,

Xo

Alisha

Overcoming Emotional Overeating through Mindset

 

I wanted to chat with you about kind of a sensitive and private topic emotional overeating and I would say honestly for myself, this was something that I really struggled with probably as early as middle school.  I grew up in kind of a crazy household. I watched my parents struggle with alcohol, drugs, infidelity, and abuse. My parents’ marriage seemed like it was always falling apart. And my brother and I were just along for the ride.

When my mom wasn’t numbing her pain with substances (illegal and legal) I remember seeing her numb her pain through food. Eating became what you did, whether you were having a good day or a bad day, you just kind of turned to food. It didn’t matter if it was a  celebration or a stressful event you went to food–or alcohol–or drugs. As I got older I knew more and more that  didn’t feel confident about who she was and I don’t know that she ever saw herself as beautiful. She may not have been the type of person that would have turned your head by her physical appearances alone, but her smile was warm when it was genuine and she had a heart of gold. Willing to give and to serve and to love to the best of her abilities. She carried a lot of wounds.   She would tell me stories of hurtful things said to her by her parents and others.  I see that she turned to substance abuse as a way to cope, and in this case food was used as one of those substances.naomi-august-138149-unsplash.jpg

When I really think about my own food story and how I’ve interacted with food over the years,  I see that it’s really been kind of this dysfunctional relationship. It’s taken years to overcome and honestly, I am still always editing my food story just as in any other area of life. As long as there is breath in our lungs, there is room to grow, and ways to be useful..a purpose to serve.

My use of food as a way to cope only seemed to get worse the older I got. We’ve all either heard  or have been the leading role in the painfully awkward stories of the teen years. No doubt, I started putting weight on and I started to become even more uncomfortable in my skin. I already sort of had this sense that there was something wrong with me. I felt  broken or like I was damaged goods. I didn’t know if there was a place for me to belong.

As my weight continued to climb I started to become desperate for a solution. I had no clue what to do, and I felt so out of control. I just wanted to feel like I could do something, anything… I tried starving myself. I tried gagging myself. I tried all the quick fixes that promised quick weight loss. Little did  I know at the time those quick fixes would only make things worse. Either because I would only fail again and again. I’d gain all the weight lost and more, or I wouldn’t actually be making any healthy and lasting changes. I wanted to do it in a healthy way, I just didn’t really know how to do that.

Like so many women I see, I just kept trying one thing after another hoping something would stick. What I didn’t realize at the time is that I was always only trying to fix things on a surface level. Trying to use a bandage on wounds that needed to be healed from the inside out, not just covered up. It really wasn’t until I started doing some deeper work around my thoughts, feelings, and ultimately my beliefs around food that things started to change for the long term.

So, today if you find yourself in any part of my crazy story I want to ask you if you’re doing the thought work? Are you allowing yourself to be healed from past wounds that you’ve been trying to cover up with food? Have you ever questioned where your feelings/thoughts/beliefs around food have come from?evieanna-santiago-589692-unsplash

I know this is not necessarily fun work to do, but friend, it is SO necessary if we want to make lasting changes. Nothing will change unless our minds are changed. And unfortunately that starts by questioning our current way of doing things.

So today’s assignment, is to spend a few moments pondering your current relationship with food and with yourself. Ask yourself the tough questions and allow the answers to come forward. Then decide what you want your story to look like going forward. How do you want to feel around food? How do you want to feel about yourself? Who do you want to be? This is the fun part! This is the part where you decide what you’re going to do and who you are going to be from this moment on.

If you are struggling with over eating, emotional eating, or anything else mentioned in this post please don’t struggle alone! I’m here to throw a lifeline, just like I wished had been done for me.

I’ve got a 5 day free challenge coming up that will help you get the start that you may need. Email me and we can see if this is the best next step for you 😉 alisha@alishacarlson.com. I can’t wait to hear from you!

xo,

Alisha

Ready to develop unstoppable confidence?

 

 What do competency, congruency,  and connection have to do with your confidence? You might be surprised..but it is just about everything when it comes to building your confidence skill. 

Wait. What?

Yes, I just referred to your confidence as a skill. That is amazing news because that means that confidence is something that can be trained and developed with practice and consistency. Sure confidence also comes from an outfit that makes you feel like a million dollars or a genuine compliment, but that kind of confidence seems temporary. To build the kind of confidence that lasts no matter what the scale says or how your hair looks you’ve got to dig a little deeper. And I hate to say it, but you’ve got to look within yourself. Maybe that is not such a bad thing after all…If your confidence is not dependent on external circumstances (ie having a good hair day or a banging body) then you can be confident no. matter. what. Build your

Let’s dive into the three Cs mentioned above, starting with competency. Think about a time in your life when you were ‘new’ at something. Because you were just learning, you might have felt like you had to double or triple check everything before you were done. But as you became more competent, your confidence grew too. So if you are new to something like working out or shopping for nutritious foods and cooking, give yourself some grace while you figure it out.

Have you ever felt like you were saying one thing, but then you kept doing something else completely? You couldn’t pinpoint exactly what, but something just felt off..I was recently in a position like this myself. The work I was doing at one point was aligned with my vision, but as I got further into it, I began to realize that my vision and what was required of me through this job did not line up.

Let me tell you, that lack of congruency between what I really wanted and what I was doing to get it made it really hard to continue doing the work. So maybe you’ve mentioned you want to get healthier or maybe you want to spend more time with your kids or your husband, but you find yourself on your phone instead of engaged with your loved ones or that you are still overeating. There is a slight disconnect between what you say you want and what you are prepared to do to get there. It is worth taking some time to explore why you might be hesitant to take the action needed to reach those goals.

So now that you’ve given yourself some time to build your competency and you’ve explored/ resolved areas around congruency with your goals + actions, let’s talk about how important it is to be connected. Not only to your goals, dreams, and aspirations, but also to others on a similar journey as yourself. When you surround yourself with others that are on the same path as you, your confidence to achieve will grow. You can cheer each other on and brain storm strategies.

Your homework for today is to explore which of these three might be missing in your endeavor to be more confident. Remember, we want to move beyond just feeling confident to being confident. I’d love to hear your thoughts and your struggles! Be sure to check out our FB community and if you need some help setting goals you are actually excited to crush, then grab this >> freebie <<

xo

Alisha

 

Photo Credit: Silva Caique

 

Confidence boosting with one simple strategy

Confidence at times can seem like a mystical unicorn. Sometimes we see little glimmers and specks of it here or there, like when we are having a good hair day or our jeans slid over our hips without any resistance. Other days however, not so much. No matter what you put on or how you try to fix your hair, you still can’t muster up even the slightest bit of confidence. I’ve been there and have had those days.

While it might feel good in the moment when everything goes as planned, it feels just as awful when it all goes south. That is why it is so important to build an unshakeable foundation of confidence. We aren’t going to do this through more exercise, makeup, or hair product, but rather by using strategies to help us build our confidence from the inside out. On solid rock rather than sinking sand.

Today I wanted to share one super simple and super effective strategy that has really shifted focus from all that I am not doing, to what I am actually doing pretty well. You may already be in the habit of journaling, and that is great! One quick question though, do you regularly journal and record your daily wins?

I wasn’t. At least not until a few months ago. I got so tired of looking at my to-do list that never seemed to be satisfied or all of the projects I wanted to start (and someday finish) for my business. There was this constant feeling of defeat each day as I lay my head down at night. I felt as if summiting the mountaintop was an impossible feat.  And while we should always be striving (in a healthy way of course) for that next level, we ought also take the time to enjoy the journey.

One easy way to do that is by recording what you are already doing. In some ways this is just an extension of practicing gratitude, and it helps you see that you are winning each and every day. Some days the wins might feel small or foolish and other days they might feel like you just slayed a giant. Either way, it is worth celebrating!

So tonight, grab a journal and jot down the first three things that come to mind as something that you accomplished or just got done. Be proud and be appreciative. This will boost your confidence immediately and will give you some inspiration to get at it again in the morning.

 

I’d love to hear how this works for you, leave a comment below with some of you wins!

Until next time 🙂

xo

Alisha

Ladies, it is time you let your light shine…

Ladies, it is time you let your light shine…

“Nothing can dim the light that shines from within”

-Maya Angelou

 

Nothing that is unless you let it. Don’t be so quick to give your power away. The light may be merely a flicker at the moment, but continue to feed that fire until it becomes an all consuming flame.

One song comes to mind when I hear this quote…this little light of mine, I’m going to let it shine. What ever happened to that confidence? Hide it under a bushel, NO! I’m going to let it shine. You were made to shine too. Don’t let anybody or anything talk you into hiding it.

That yearning for something more is put there for a reason. Don’t ignore the call on your heart. Feed the flame and one day it will be the burning fire you desire it to be. Nothing can dim the light that shines from within-Maya Angelou

It is hard to do this on your own though, isn’t it? That is why having community is SO important. If you are looking for that community, for that tribe, then look no more. We’ve got you covered. Search Find your T.H.R.I.V.E on FB and join the other women on this journey with you.

 

xo

Alisha

Weight loss is nice, but what about the rest of your life?

Too late for a #throwback?

I was 26 and probably about 15 pounds lighter in the picture on the left.

I was also exhausted from being a mom of two young kids and felt drained all the time.

I was trying so hard to be the perfect mom and wife and was honestly miserable in so many ways.

I was putting everyone first and chasing the wrong things.

I would make the excuse that I didn’t have time to take care of what mattered, because I had let busy take over, and tried to keep up certain appearances.

This is the side of motherhood that is rarely, if ever talked about because motherhood is supposed to be one of the best times of our lives as women.. my heart is racing even as I type my feelings so openly. There were days I thought about running away and leaving them all behind.

Looking back, maybe I was suffering from a little #postpartumdepression, bit more than that I think I was suffering from putting so much pressure on doing it ‘right’.

Fast forward 7 years.

I see life and vibrancy and passion in her eyes.

I see a woman who has completely embraced motherhood in all of its messiness and a wife that has endured a great deal of heartache over the last 11 years. But she is filled with joy. She is content. And she is confidently laughing at whatever the future may hold.

If you’re still reading this, I hope you know you’re not alone. Motherhood is messy. Being a wife takes a lot of work and a lot of sacrifice.

I’ve heard you can’t have it all…I’m starting to think that’s a lie. If you ever feel alone, know that you are not. My inbox is always open

🖤🖤 #findyourthrive